The Strong Black Woman

The Strong Black Woman.

In my GWS/Afro class we discussed the Moynihan Report. Moynihan’s idea was the problem with the black family is that the black woman had too much power and the men were emasculated. I have a problem with this for so many reasons.

First off usually the image of the strong black woman is a woman who is loud, aggressive, confrontational and all around unpleasant. She never smiles and is very difficult to deal with. You know the lip smacking, rolling her eyes pointing her finger type of woman. Or a strong black woman means a single mother who is working hard to raise her children. I say lets re-examine the definition of the strong black woman. Couldn’t a strong black woman be mild mannered, articulate, educated and childless? Couldn’t a strong black woman be easy going? Shouldn’t a strong black woman be a woman who’s after positive change in her life and for those around her?

Another observation of mine and anyone is free to argue with me on this is usually that in your face type of woman is not strong at all but quite the opposite. I would say she doesn’t emasculated her man at all and that she actually needs to be more assertive. Lets think about it. There are plenty of woman who demand and receive nothing from their partners. How many people have friends who’ve never been on dates? Grown ass women who cant say they’ve been picked up and taken to dinner and a movie. She is okay with being a baby momma or a girlfriend for seven years. Many women date men who are ok with having sex with them unprotected, ok with getting them pregnant, ok with living with them but not ok with marrying them. Think about it ladies, how many of us have a friend who has contracted a disease from a guy because he refused to wear a condom? Its no wonder that black women are rapidly contracting HIV. The black woman needs to be a tad bit stronger. I’m a firm believer in the saying you teach people how to treat you. And if you accept anything you get anything.

I would continue to argue that the black woman’s most prized possession is her man. The black woman doesn’t emasculate her man , the black woman loves her man. Its black woman that the black woman doesn’t like . The constant bad looks or stares, black women give other black women. Most black men can do no wrong. How many defend R. Kelly or Chris Brown and men like him? And then on the flip side tear down a woman and calling her a whore and a bitch in a minute. Oftentimes sisterhood is lost.

And if the black woman is strong its because she had to be. There wasn’t a strong black man when she needed one.

Also I would like to address the issue so when does the presence of a strong black woman mean the men are weak. If black communities are going to thrive, isn’t both strong black men and women needed? I think both black men and women need higher standards for themselves.

I hope what I wrote isn’t misconstrued. All I meant here is to say I believe the image of the strong black woman that ‘s perpetuated in the media is wrong. I think the black woman need higher standards. I think the black man needs to meet those standards. What I want to do here is ask what do you think it means to be a strong black woman? What do you think are the problems with black families? its definitely not the issue of black women asserting themselves